I was so incensed this morning, when not only did one person blow smoke in my face when they were casually having that desperate last toke before they enter their office, but whilst at a cash machine, the bloke behind was smoking those small cigars (cigarillos?) and I copped a huge waft of stink for the second time in quick succession. This made me fling up a Stalkbook rant, where a few people shared my view on it being an intrusion of ‘personal space’, which subsequently got me to write this blog entry.
It will come as no surprise from the introductory paragraph that I hate smoking. I don’t HATE many things, as I feel it’s such a harsh word, but I reserve it for smoking. Ask my old dear, I’m constantly on at her about trying to give up, as it’s such a wretched habit and the bottom line is, I don’t want to see her health deteriorate because of it. Thankfully, right now she’s fine and I hope she can one day kick the habit. But it is that isn’t it? A habit, an addiction. I have my addictions of course. If eBay were able to send me some stats on how many times I log in to look at trainers or goalie gloves, you’d see that one of my addictions is just as costly as a smoking habit!!
Why do I dislike smoking quite so much? I’m not 100% sure, but one of the main factors is that it stinks, and as you know, I’m the ‘Nicest Smelling DJ In The Game’ and can’t be having any of that Death Breath, yellow teeth and stinky fingers flex on my goodself!! I know plenty of my mates, and obviously my family smoke, and if you read this, I can hardly apologise for the truth that smoking brings to YOUR life. So don’t hold it against me for calling it out #SorryNotSorry
How come YOU smoke? Nah seriously, I’m interested. What makes that person reach for the B&H the second they leave the train station each morning? Is it something psychological? Because it’s not like it can scientifically relieve you of the stress of the rat race but I guess YOU feel there is something comforting sucking on that tar stick? Obviously being a non-smoker this bit intrigues me a little, so don’t be shy. Speak up at the back.
Now maybe some of you are thinking ‘I bet you’ve smoked before in your life, as everyone has’. Well I can tell you for a fact, I’ve NEVER had a whole cigarette in my life. When I was really young and just as curious as I am as an adult, I asked my Mum about her fags and she actually gave me a puff on one. It’ll be no surprise that I choked my guts up. Not necessarily the best example of parenting, but it done the job. I’m actually very grateful of that funny little moment in Mother/Son time. It put me off smoking, right there and then. Of course I had a teenage dalliance, through peer pressure, when fags were passed around the back of school, but knocked that on the head pretty sharpish.
I probably sound a bit self-righteous going off on this rant? Well I just wonder to myself, why would you want to knowingly and slowly kill yourself and smell like an ash tray for the pleasure, whilst spending a fair whack for the privilege? Thankfully a tide is turning. It’s no longer cool to smoke and it’s been a long time since I’ve come back from DJing in a club with my clothes stinking of fags. The smoking ban in public places has been implemented across most of Europe (although it’s not enforced in other countries anywhere near as much as it is here in the UK) and its even been adopted in Dubai and they love a good chuff over there. What I have seen a lot more recently in clubs, is the E-cigarette. Isn’t this the way forward for you lot that need your fix? Surely it’s the best of both worlds for the smoking crew? No stench, you get your fix and it even looks like you have a fag, I mean, it even has that little puff of smoke.
If I look into my crystal ball, I think that in the future smoking will fade out gradually (I also predict Kelly Brook will get dumped by Danny Cappuccino and will then date another rugby player). In doing so, governments will lose out on the tax. What they’ll then do is legalise certain drugs and pick up the tax slack that way. Portugal has had a radical stance on the legalisation of drugs (up to a certain amount) for over 10 years. So what says other European countries won’t follow suit? One thing’s for sure, that if the arse does fall out of the tobacco market – HERES HOPING!! – those greedy MPs will be clawing that lost moolah another way. FACT!
Quite a weird blog reading that back. Started off enraged at the ignorance of people that think it’s OK to get you on a passive smoking flex and then ended on a semi-political tip. My mind is a funny old place sometimes, it really is!!